Tuesday, July 6, 2021

Lead me not into temptation...

 "It is the most patriotic thing you can do," said President Biden, emphasizing the importance of getting vaxed, during his address to the nation on the occasion of America's 245th Independence Day. The fact that Covid-19 vaccination drive found an honorable place in Biden's 4th of July speech just goes on to illustrate the chasm dividing the country over the issue of 'to vax or not to vax'. 

A country that thrives on weekly coupons, seasonal sales, Black Fridays, Boxing Day bonanza, the need to tempt the reluctant, vax-fearing citizen with some irresistible combos, coupling vaccination with goodies was heartfelt across the board. 

Panera, the popular food chain picked up the cue, immediately announcing a free bagel for all those  customers who produced  proof of vaccination. Macdonalds, Krispy Kreme, Taco Bells, Chipotle however have already been part of the great vax mission with their own platter of freebies for  those who shall obey. 

As food chains and stores are vying with each other while piling patriotism and sales pitch together, corporations like Amazon have dangled an enticing Honeycrisp apple for its employees in the form of a free vaccination clinic on site and Benjamins! The grocery chain Albertson too  has promised its vaxed employees 100 dollars.

If businesses are doing their share to help battle the pandemic, desperate states also have been preoccupied with conjuring up ways to tempt the residents to get their shots. Over and done with. To a safer, better and stronger America! Sounds like a war-cry alright.  Even though the states seem to have drained their power of imagination with one-upping each other for vaccine rewards, the offers aren't alluring enough to compel the fervent non-believers into compliance. With New Jersey promising free beer, New York MetroCards, Connecticut any beverage of one's choice, it is truly the trigger-happy West Virginia which seems to have clinched the deal  by including a $1.5 million cash prize, custom-outfitted trucks, and custom hunting rifles and shotguns, glamorously packaged as weekly lotteries for the vaccinated lot. Any West Virginian who has received at least one COVID-19 dose will be eligible to register. 

Yet, trust Washington itself to weed through ideas to come up with its own 'high' bar for incentives. Whether as a mood enhancer for those stuck at home waiting out the natural side effects of their shots, or as a lollipop for those solid citizens willing to take one (or two) for the Team, an advocacy group from the District of Columbia has managed to put forth a truly winning plan: one joint of Grade A, All-American marijuana to the willingly vaccinated candidate. "Joints for Jabs". Even the name is a clincher. And while it does toe the line with the rest of the nation's endeavour, one can't help but be more than slightly dumbfounded. Marijuana, vilified on the Hill until just a few years ago as the Green Dragon that was turning the country's moral fiber to ashes, is now being freely distributed, as both reward and testament of willingness to sacrifice whatever is necessary for the sake of the nation: the ultimate proof of a True American. 

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